Be friendly, you never know where it'll take you.

If I ever see any of you in public, the code is “I like your shoelaces”

that way we know we’re from tumblr without revealing anything

I’m just going to say this to strangers until i find a tumblr person

must keep reblogering!! Im going to be so suspicious if any one tells me this now!

Remember the answer is: I stole them from the president.

(Source: aru, via dasha-x)

clever-one-word-url:

GUYS MY 10 YEAR OLD BROTHER WAS JUST TELLING BE ABOUT HOW HE KNOWS EVERY GUY’S CRUSH IN HIS CLASS AND H KEEPS TRACK OF IT SO THAT IF A GUY GETS A NEW CRUSH HE GOES AND CALLS THE GIRL AND LETS HER KNOW. HE LITERALLY USED THE PHRASE “I’M IN THE BUSINESS”. 

GUYS

MY BROTHER IS A 5TH GRADE PIMP

(Source: jourdonnais, via a-million-times-over)

therealhorusszahhak:

This guy at my school shows up every day with like a fake wolf tail clipped to his back belt loop, and I always see him running from class to class and jumping over things and he looks so happy to exist and sometimes he brings a lil wolf puppet with him and he makes it run along next to him on the strings
I’m just like u go wolf kid live ur dreams

(via a-million-times-over)

aepicstranger:

thisretrodreamisneverending:

In physics the other day my teacher started having this coughing fit

so he says ‘I THINK SATAN IS CHOKING ME’

and I just went ‘Sorry’ and he stopped coughing

omg I think everyone in my class is terrified now.

i am still laughing at this from like twenty minutes ago

(Source: neverendingretrodream, via a-million-times-over)

brvdleysoileau:

how is “slut” even an insult wtf get that dick grl

(via rad1calcunt)